Tuesday, March 31, 2009

It's just been One of those days

It's just been one of those days.

One of those days when the alarm goes off, you hit what you think is the snooze button and wake up, late, when 3 zits appear out of no where in weird and painfully noticeable places, when you can't get motivated to do anything you really need to do, but amazingly find time for things like sending pictures and emails to Cambodia or tweezing your eyebrows, when you try on at least 6 shirts and all of them look like something you would've worn in 3rd grade, when you heard the weather was going to be nice, but instead it's 34 degrees and snowing.

It's been one of those days when you look at the deadlines approaching like a swarm of angry sea gulls and you want to run and hide for cover, but you have to stay on the freezing, cold beach, barefoot and brave the attack with a smile on your face, when you only eat refined carbohydrates and peanut butter all day and it makes you sick and bloated (thank you giardhea, worms, parasites, amoebas, and yeast, thankyou), when your car you bought to sell and make profit breaks down and costs more than $1500, on top of the fees to get it towed, when you are alone all day with your head in a less than interesting text book that threatens any passion for life you have left in you.

It has indeed been one of those days when people need more than you have to offer, when you forgot to clock out of work last week and have logged in 59 hours of too obviously inaccurate hours, when every blond, skinny, trendy, beautiful woman on campus pays you a visit and eyeballs the 3 large zits on your face, and burning 475 calories at the gym just doesn't seem like enough, ever.

One of those days when you have mounds to do and amazingly none of it gets done, when your hair does strange things only confirming your belief that it really is a separate entity of its own, when the kids you left behind in Cambodia feel painfully far away as well as the once-inspired teacher who taught them, when you are supposed to write a 12-15 page term paper on your Christian philosophy of education, but you don't know what your Christian philosophy of education is, when everyone you need to talk to "just went to lunch" all afternoon.

It's been one of those days when you cannot silence the voices in your head telling you that you are "worthless", "lazy", "unmotivated", and every other negative adjective you can think of, when life seems out-of-control, when it all seems too much and instead of actually accomplishing the work in front of you, you write a blog and send it into space, hoping someone, anyone else feels even slightly the same way.


Hannah said...

Not slightly--totally. Days like that are awful :-( ::e-hug::

caitlyn brianne said...

today, well the last week, has felt like this! I know exactly what you are talking about!! thank you Heather i'm not the only one!

shelli said...

um... me to.

Also, a quick note to say that i met a guy named Jared this weekend at Southern who said he met you when you came to see Jeremy AND he said he thought you were cool :) Thought i'd share that.... i told him, "i've known her longer and i think she's cooler." lol. jk. apparently i was feeling competitive!

miss you!