Monday, February 14, 2011

Valentine

Today, I ran four miles while watching "Good Morning America." I'm a bit worried that doing this will render me unable to run a half-marathon without constant stimulation to distract me. At least I learned about the current status of the Chilean miners and the best color to wear for someone with green eyes. Purple. (I'm running a half-marathon. I'm signed up. There's no turning back now. Correction: Yes, I can turn back now. It's more accurate to say; I've decided not to turn back now.)

Today, the sun came out of its hiding, graced this barren land with 50 degree temperatures, and I wore a skirt, damnit.

Today, my boyfriend, Jeremy made me a valentine. It was big, like 2 feet tall, with hearts and kind words, and the first question out of my mouth was, "Who made this?" He looked at me a bit surprised and said, "I did." Sometimes I speak too soon. He's so good to me.

Today, I ate gluten-free pasta and sauce mixed with textured vegetable protein (otherwise TVP), and dairy-free "cheese." I'll admit it was really tasty and eating with limitations has taught me to get freaking creative, but still, I'll be happy if/when all this food allergy stuff is behind me.

Today, for an assignment I taught a 15 minute micro-lesson to peers about stories. If you haven't read Donald Miller's A Million Miles in a Thousand Years, I highly recommend it. I based the lesson on short stories around writing and living a life full of adventure, conflict, risk, and joy. These are the stories we all like to read about and watch on screen, this is the life I want to live.

Today, I plopped down in my seat in college algebra only to find I did the wrong days assignment. Again. NOW, what he was teaching made sense. But the three hours I spent muddling through the homework I hadn't yet been taught was clear as mud. My tummy hurt. The room was hot and kinda smelly. I spent a bit too much time beating myself up about my technical difficulty. By the time he handed me the in-class assignment to be completed before leaving the class room, I wasn't in a good place. Then, I was supposed to do algebra. I struggled through 75 % of it, got frustrated, gathered my things, and walked out of the room.

Today, upon realizing that running away from my problems wasn't going to get the algebra done, I walked outside, all the way to the cafeteria, stopped, took a deep breath, and walked back to the math building. I took some more deep breaths and completed the assignment.

Today, I remembered that the 3rd grade version of myself who felt stupid in every math class since then, doesn't have to be who I am today.

Today, I ate a banana and remembered when bananas used to be healthy. You know before they began rating certain fruits healthier than others? Before bananas had too many carbs. Before I knew where they were farmed, what pesticides where used, who picked them, and how much carbon emissions were used to bring that banana to my mouth. I want to be intentional. I want to be part of the solution. But I kinda miss when a banana was just a banana. Ignorance is bliss, I suppose.

Today, I looked in my planner full of deadlines, assignments, and responsibilities and wanted to cry.

Today, my Dad called from a few hundred miles away to ask me if I would be his Valentine. I said, "Always." And I could hear the tears flood his eyes.

Today, my uptight teacher said, "funky." I chuckled. Another student grinned. We had a moment.

Today, I woke up with plenty of air in my lungs.
My heart never stopped beating. Not once.
Good people smiled at me.
I had food to eat.
And I'm safe.

I'd say it was a good day.

2 comments:

Kylie said...

Thanks for reminding me of all of the good we have in our lives...

Lindsey said...

I love this post. :) You're better than I am when it comes to getting through any kind of math, though I can relate to feeling like I'm not any good at it. I'm glad that you were able to find some things that brightened your day. I got teary at your comment about your dad- aren't we lucky to have fantastic male figures in our lives?

Silly comment, but I'm glad you had a good day. :)