Sunday, April 12, 2015

A Few Good Men

In one month, Jeremy and I will be celebrating our three year anniversary.

And ever since we've been together--for the past NINE years--I've known that I picked a winner. And I knew this mostly because he reminded me a lot of my Dad. Two men in my life, who have been such wonderful models of good, strong, loving men. I consider myself to be enormously blessed by both of them.

My Dad was never the guy who expected less from me because I was a girl or more of my brother because he was a boy. I had to mow the lawn. My brother had to do dishes. Fair is fair. Because I loved athletics, he came to every basketball game. But if I was into poetry, he'd have been in the front row there, too.

And Jeremy has never been the guy who plays on useless gender stereotypes in our relationship. He doesn't make jokes about his "crazy, hormonal wife" or have expectations for me just because I'm the woman and it's what I "should" do. We are both allowed to cry. We are both allowed to fart. We are both allowed to make mistakes. We are both allowed to have feelings. We can be who we want to be.

That, my friend, is liberation.

And on that note, I bring you this TED talk from Tony Porter.

In it, he says:
"We [men] are very much part of the solution as well as the problem. The Center for Disease Control says that men's violence against women is at epidemic proportions. It's the number one health concern for women in this country and abroad."

We need to teach our sons:

"That it's okay to not be dominating.
That it's okay to have feelings and emotions.
That it's okay to promote equality.
That it's okay to have women who are just friends and that's it.
That it's okay to be whole.
That my liberation as a man is tied to your liberation as a woman."

Thank God for good men.